This Fragile Life

I thought the earth was solid,
That even the craziness of life had meaning
Until the day I sat next to your lifeless body,
My heart shattered, tears streaming down my face.

No longer could I take a step without
The ground shaking under my feet,
Wondering if I would be able to navigate
this foreign landscape that made no sense.

Time, as I knew it, no longer existed
As I watched people rush by like
They hadn’t felt the tectonic plates shift
Knowing that they could drop into the abyss at any moment.

The fog washed over me as I tended to death’s chores.
The worst were the calls to say that you were dead.
No one wants to hear those sorrowful words
That were screaming in my soul.

I wasn’t prepared to pick out funeral homes,
Or how many people I would have to speak with
To arrange my life without you.
The never-ending paperwork that said you no longer existed.

Your death changed me,
Splitting my world into before and after.
Thirteen years ago, can seem like yesterday
When I’m hit by a trigger that reminds me
that you’re never coming back.